Says Who?

Are you looking for some friendly company to help you through the hell that we find ourselves in after the 2016 election? Dan Sinker and Maureen Johnson—one journalist and one author—try to figure out what the hell is going on. Maybe, together, they can figure it out (spoiler alert: probably not)! Why not grab your coffee (or something stronger) and pull up a chair?

SAYS WHO: it's not a podcast—it's a coping strategy.

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    Ep. 19: FINKER, FAILURE, F**KER, SPY with Ted Leo

    Dan and Maureen are back after a month of dealing with life, and the new Says Who is here! What is new? Well, they’re back with guests and a SCHEDULE! And there's certainly been a lot to catch up on. We’ve had the first battle over health care. The President pretended to drive a big truck and golfed thirteen times. And then, Russia! Maureen attempts to create an audio flowchart of events and issues the first Says Who Crafting Challenge: make your own conspiracy wall! Dan busts in with critical info he’s been keeping from Maureen and issues the second Says Who Crafting Challenge: let’s put a billboard outside of Paul Ryan’s grocery store! Then we turn to our guest--musician and all-round good guy Ted Leo--to talk about how he stays creative inside this awful Trump headspace. Turns out, he likes to read some really relaxing books. Then he drops a bombshell of an Action Park story that brings everything full circle and Maureen loses it a little. Says Who is back in town--bigger and better than ever. Let’s ride the slide together while we’re all still insured. Wheeeeeee!

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    We know a ton is going on right now, but some Life Stuff made it so we had to hit the pause button on new full-length episodes of Says Who for the time being. In fact, this will be the last episode of any size from Says Who for a couple more weeks BUT DON'T DESPAIR SAYSWHOVIANS because in this Minicast we do the one thing that you all have been asking for more than anything else: We make that theme park favorite, Dole Whip! That's right, Dan steps into the Says Who Test Kitchen to whip up a batch of this tasty frozen treat. Plus, there's a special treat of a song by Neko Case for those that stay all the way through the end. Grab your blender and follow along folks, It's a special Says Who Minicast!

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    Ep. 18: OH SHIP!

    Ahoy! Maureen is on a boat. Specifically, she is on the Joco Cruise—a ship full of musicians, podcasters, comedians, artists, and nerds, which is happily sailing the Baja peninsula. She’s been a little out of touch, what with all the shows, games, and taco bars she has to attend. Dan is left to fill her in on what’s been happening. And what has been happening? Oh, nothing. It’s been super quiet since last Tuesday. Except for the news about Russia, Jeff Sessions, the accusations of wire tapping, the new travel ban, and the Trumpcare bill. Just those things.

    In Dole Whip news, Dan has ALSO injured his finger trying to make a homemade Dole Whip. Maureen sees this as a portent. How long can the center hold? How can we take this much news? Will Maureen just remain at sea on the nerd boat and become part of a new society? Will Dan get ensnared the yarn of his crazy wall and never emerge from his basement again?

    Put on your life jackets, Sayswhovians. It’s seven bells, and the ship is tilting.

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    Ep. 17: CUT AND RUN

    Dan spent last night sitting up watching Trump’s speech. Maureen spent last night in the emergency room getting her finger sewn up and missed Trump speech. How did Maureen hurt her finger? On a Dole Whip. Who had the better night? We know the answer. Maureen did. She is living the Says Who dream. After two strange weeks in the gaslit fog of the Trump presidency, we gather once again to discuss haunted mansions, bizarre speeches, lies, deceit, ketchup on steaks, and yes, Dan’s personal favorite, Mar-a-Lago! Who let KellyAnne put her feet on the sofa? Who is in charge of putting Xanax into Trump’s blue cheese dressing? And how can you make Dole Whip at home? Only some of these questions will be answered, but you will hear the tap of Maureen’s metal fingersplint, and that is pretty good. Step into the Says Who office. The doctor will see you now.

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    Like many of you, Dan and Maureen have lost all sense of what time means. Now that every day feels like a year, they are struggling to compress two weeks of Trump news into one podcast. This is a near-impossible task, but that won’t stop them. We visit Dan’s Crazy Wall, where he is pointing his laser pointer to the new Mar-a-Lago and Michael Flynn wings. Maureen is in a tropical paradise and seems to have a better grip on reality, but then the subject of salad wedges comes up and things rapidly fall apart. Never before has a quarter head of lettuce lead to the complete devolution of political and social mores. (Sidenote: that salad is known as “Mr. Trump’s Wedge Salad” on the Mar-a-Lago menu.) This episode contains strong language, but you can probably handle it. We think. Look, it was a rough two weeks. Anyway, we’ll see you at Nordstroms.

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    What the hell just happened? Is something you might be asking yourself. Because something is happening every damn hour. This is Trump's America, where if you stop for a minute, you're catching up for a year.

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    Well, here we are. We’ve gotten on the roller coaster car, the bar has come down, and now it’s making that tick-tick-tick as it takes us up the big hill. This is happening. Dan and Maureen discuss the glories of the inauguration entertainment lineup. Maureen is kind of obsessed with it. Dan’s is thinking about his escape to Disneyland. His hotel sells Dole Whip. IN THE HOTEL. But most of this episode features YOU, the listeners, calling in and telling us what you plan to do for the inauguration. The only way we’re going to get through this is together, so we’re drawing on the voices of others to lift ourselves up. Listen while you’re marching. Listen when you’re at home not watching the inauguration. The way is together.

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    Ep. 13: WEE THE PEOPLE

    Oh boy oh boy oh boy, Sayswhovians. It's been a wild 24 hours, so your hosts went to their closets and basements to break it all down. From last night's urine-soaked news, to Dan's first person report of Obama's final address, to this morning's hearings, and finally the day unspooling into the bizarre real-time breakdown that was the Trump press conference. We reconstruct the events, perhaps just to prove to ourselves that they really happened and that we're all in the same reality. From a night in Chicago to a spray in Moscow: we go through it all. Come for the urine, stay for the fake news. Maybe we'll even show you what's in this stack of folders we've collected next to this podcast. You're the puppet!

    Content note: contains current. Possibly not suitable for tiny ears, tiny hands.

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    Welcome to 2017! Dan has been snowed in to a Marriott Residence Inn in Colorado for two days with two children and a dog. Maureen is sitting in her dark closet in New York City with a small, retractable flashlight she refuses to turn on. Somehow, these things explain the course of the new year. This is Weird America, and we’re ready. It’s time to push ahead and pick up tools. Which tools? Where to go? We’re ready to start asking the questions and making plans. Let’s talk about the Affordable Care Act, the right to health care, driving in Colorado, crane rides, log flumes, and small, retractable flashlights. Did we mention the flashlights? They will come up. Listen for them. Take heart, take hope, get weird. It’s 2017. Wherever you are, you are not alone. Shine your tiny light and others will find you. Together, you will make one bigger, brighter light.

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    Ho Ho Ho holiday pals! Maureen and Dan don their kerchiefs and caps, force their faces into a grin-like shape and settle down for a long winter's nap. Sure, Santa stops by for a moment, but then he finds out about Trump. And then Dan and Maureen are left to talk about cults, conspiracy theories, and the insane, awful reality we all now find ourselves in. But it's not all gloom: They also bring you the first annual Says Who Holiday Gift Guide--full of actually useful ideas for ways of supporting journalism, the arts, your local community, your friends, and yourself. So have yourself a merry little whatever and enjoy the Says Who Holiday Special.

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