Says Who?

Are you looking for some friendly company to help you through the hell that we find ourselves in after the 2016 election? Dan Sinker and Maureen Johnson—one journalist and one author—try to figure out what the hell is going on. Maybe, together, they can figure it out (spoiler alert: probably not)! Why not grab your coffee (or something stronger) and pull up a chair?

SAYS WHO: it's not a podcast—it's a coping strategy.

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    It's time for an old-fashioned dose of your friends Dan and Maureen losing their minds in real time! Dan has had a legitimately terrible few weeks, so its just no guests, mics on, and GO. It's time to talk coping, healthcare, fake Time Magazine covers, rubbing your school bus driver's shoulders as you careen down a hill, the latest scandals at Disney's Hall of Presidents (complete with EXCLUSIVE SAYS WHO SOURCES)--you know all the stuff you'd expect in this, the darkest timeline. Plus, Maureen thinks up a new revenue stream because Blue Apron never called, Dan has trouble with his Alexa, and WHAT IS LURKING IN MITCH MCCONNELL'S CHIMNEY???

    It's just you, the moon, and Says Who. We're all in this together.

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    Ep. 24: THE SAYS WHO DISNEY SPECTACULAR with Hal Lublin and Mark Gagliardi

    It's been a long two weeks and Dan is done. It's all just gotten to be too much. Maureen is ready to talk about Comey and sentient banjo Jeff Sessions but Dan cannot do it any more. How can we save Dan Sinker before he is sunk? Maureen has an idea: A FULL-ON DISNEY SPECTACULAR with podcast superstars (and Disney superfans) Hal Lublin and Mark Gagliardi! We've long promised that when Trump leaves office--by resignation, impeachment, massive constipation from too much beef--we are off to Disney World. Well today we decide that a wish is a dream your heart makes and so we have to FOLLOW OUR DREAMS, Sayswhovians. Even if it takes us to a theme park in central Florida. What happens if you drop in the Tower of Terror 35 times a day for a month--does it better prepare you for life under Trump? What's going on inside the Hall of Presidents? If Trump went to Epcot's World Showcase, would he think it was real? And how could we trap him there? Is Trump's plane powered by his butt? How has Maureen's personality been influenced by a haunted painting? Will Blue Apron become a sponsor? When Trump leaves offices, what's the first ride YOU ride? This Says Who only happens if you truly believe. Clap! Clap! No, seriously. CLAP.

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    Ep. 23: NATIONAL LAMPOON’S PRESIDENTIAL VACATION with Jeff Larson, Surya Mattu, and Julia Angwin

    Summer arrives at Says Who and Maureen and Dan dream of bobbing in the dappled sunshine off the Florida coast. But they're not the only ones setting their sights on a little summertime outing. The president went off to see the world and, thanks to world leaders accommodating his beefy dietary needs, possibly spent 10 days without pooping. But he did get to have a friendly visit with the Pope, touch a glow orb, see Saudi Arabian country superstar Toby Keith (wait, that's not right), and have his tiny hands crushed a few dozen times in handshake wars. Plus, we all got a vacation from his Twitter account for a week or so. Felt great, didn't it? In addition, this episode really does step on to a boat and moors it right outside Mar a Lago when Jeff Larson, Surya Mattu, and Julia Angwin of ProPublica and Gizmodo join to discuss their watery investigation into the Trump Organization's cyber security. This interview is even more delightful than that sounds. So ahoy there matey, it's time to walk the plank.

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    Ep. 22: A HEDGE SALAD IS A SALAD with Clara Jeffery

    Well that escalated quickly. Maureen and Dan play catch up with the events surrounding the sudden firing of FBI Director James Comey. Sure, he didn't do well by Clinton's emails, but all indications are he was leading pretty deep investigations into all this Trump Russia stuff. Aaand, now he's not. That's convenient. Oh, and the Russia stuff? Now they're in the Oval Office too. Sure, why not. So much has happened in the last two weeks (SO MUCH) that we call in an expert to help us sort out truth from fiction: Mother Jones' Editor in Chief Clara Jeffery.

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    Ep. 21: A NEW SALAD IN TOWN with Tarini Parti

    Happy 100 days of Trump! And what a hundred days they have been, full of...wait. Forget all that. Maureen has an important salad report. She's gone back to 1972 and brought back something green. Green and fluffy. And, Buzzfeed's Tarini Parti stops by to talk about about the creeps and hustlers in orbit around Trump. How did the local bars around Mar-a-lago suddenly become a nexus of political gossip, scams, and all around strange happenings?

    100 days. It's harder than we thought!

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    Ep. 20: THE MEATLOAF FILES with Helen Rosner

    In two weeks, we've seen: an egg roll, the continued drip drip drip on the shady characters in the Trump-Russia story, a family feud between a white supremacist and a rich son-in-law, the ongoing shredding of rights and infrastructure, Sean Spicer coining the stomach-churning term "Holocaust centers," and the start of two armed conflicts by a man who's finally undone the child lock on the boom-boom room. Oh, and a possible nuclear war with North Korea because of Twitter.

    So Eater's Helen Rosner joins Maureen & Dan to talk about what Trump eats. It turns out, that's the key to understanding the man.

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    Ep. 19: FINKER, FAILURE, F**KER, SPY with Ted Leo

    Dan and Maureen are back after a month of dealing with life, and the new Says Who is here! What is new? Well, they’re back with guests and a SCHEDULE! And there's certainly been a lot to catch up on. We’ve had the first battle over health care. The President pretended to drive a big truck and golfed thirteen times. And then, Russia! Maureen attempts to create an audio flowchart of events and issues the first Says Who Crafting Challenge: make your own conspiracy wall! Dan busts in with critical info he’s been keeping from Maureen and issues the second Says Who Crafting Challenge: let’s put a billboard outside of Paul Ryan’s grocery store! Then we turn to our guest--musician and all-round good guy Ted Leo--to talk about how he stays creative inside this awful Trump headspace. Turns out, he likes to read some really relaxing books. Then he drops a bombshell of an Action Park story that brings everything full circle and Maureen loses it a little. Says Who is back in town--bigger and better than ever. Let’s ride the slide together while we’re all still insured. Wheeeeeee!

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    We know a ton is going on right now, but some Life Stuff made it so we had to hit the pause button on new full-length episodes of Says Who for the time being. In fact, this will be the last episode of any size from Says Who for a couple more weeks BUT DON'T DESPAIR SAYSWHOVIANS because in this Minicast we do the one thing that you all have been asking for more than anything else: We make that theme park favorite, Dole Whip! That's right, Dan steps into the Says Who Test Kitchen to whip up a batch of this tasty frozen treat. Plus, there's a special treat of a song by Neko Case for those that stay all the way through the end. Grab your blender and follow along folks, It's a special Says Who Minicast!

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    Ep. 18: OH SHIP!

    Ahoy! Maureen is on a boat. Specifically, she is on the Joco Cruise—a ship full of musicians, podcasters, comedians, artists, and nerds, which is happily sailing the Baja peninsula. She’s been a little out of touch, what with all the shows, games, and taco bars she has to attend. Dan is left to fill her in on what’s been happening. And what has been happening? Oh, nothing. It’s been super quiet since last Tuesday. Except for the news about Russia, Jeff Sessions, the accusations of wire tapping, the new travel ban, and the Trumpcare bill. Just those things.

    In Dole Whip news, Dan has ALSO injured his finger trying to make a homemade Dole Whip. Maureen sees this as a portent. How long can the center hold? How can we take this much news? Will Maureen just remain at sea on the nerd boat and become part of a new society? Will Dan get ensnared the yarn of his crazy wall and never emerge from his basement again?

    Put on your life jackets, Sayswhovians. It’s seven bells, and the ship is tilting.

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    Ep. 17: CUT AND RUN

    Dan spent last night sitting up watching Trump’s speech. Maureen spent last night in the emergency room getting her finger sewn up and missed Trump speech. How did Maureen hurt her finger? On a Dole Whip. Who had the better night? We know the answer. Maureen did. She is living the Says Who dream. After two strange weeks in the gaslit fog of the Trump presidency, we gather once again to discuss haunted mansions, bizarre speeches, lies, deceit, ketchup on steaks, and yes, Dan’s personal favorite, Mar-a-Lago! Who let KellyAnne put her feet on the sofa? Who is in charge of putting Xanax into Trump’s blue cheese dressing? And how can you make Dole Whip at home? Only some of these questions will be answered, but you will hear the tap of Maureen’s metal fingersplint, and that is pretty good. Step into the Says Who office. The doctor will see you now.

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