Says Who?
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Are you looking for some friendly company to help you through the hell that we find ourselves in after the 2016 election? Dan Sinker and Maureen Johnson—one journalist and one author—try to figure out what the hell is going on. Maybe, together, they can figure it out (spoiler alert: probably not)! Why not grab your coffee (or something stronger) and pull up a chair?

SAYS WHO: it's not a podcast—it's a coping strategy.

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    99 PROBLEMS

    Great Googliemooglie.

    Dan and Maureen meet once again, this time both on American soil. Maureen is home in New York, and Dan wandering the west, though he no longer spends his time in hot cars outside of pyramids. The summer of 2019 rages on. Rage being the operative word.

    It was not, to put it mildly, the best week ever. Things in the US are not going great. There have been two mass shootings in 24 hours. And there were two debates. Terrible twos. Dan and Maureen are having a hard time making sense of it all. But the job is not to make sense--it is to cope. And they have been coping for 99 episodes now and are staring at the oncoming 100th episode.

    So.

    Dan watched the debates because Maureen did not and has prepared his report. His report is that he did not like them. Maureen gives her ringworm update. And Amy Carter's Shoe reveals more than ever before.

    99 episodes of Says Who in your feed. 99 eps of Says Who There were supposed to be eight But things didn't go great 99 eps of Says Who

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    THE DARK TEATIME OF THE SOUL

    Pip pip! Maureen is in England, trying to enjoy life for a second. But Dan is lurking, and he has notes. He was been following the news. Maureen cannot hide in butterflies and sunshine and tea. There are Events to Process. There's no running away.

    So what has been happening? Well, Trump is turning up the racism, which is not news--it's just turning everything up to eleven. But racism. So much. Things are rolling downhill faster and faster.

    Maureen is desperate. She'll talk about anything but the news. Anything. Literally anything.

    Things go downhill. But we go downhill together. It's time to roll, SaysWhovia. Down the hill. Here we go.

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    BAD NEWS EVE

    What can we say, really.

    Summer burns on, and things continue to brew. Dan is in Colorado, and Maureen is about to go to England. The UK has a new Prime Minister. Mueller is about to testify. We're on the verge of everything and nothing. And Dan and Maureen are...well, not well. Their brains are turning to gravy.

    Here follows are two people trying to make it all make sense. How does it end? Impeachment? Change? More of the same? Or...IN A MUSICAL?

    Stay vigilant, SaysWhovia. We're in the Weird Times.

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    THE GREAT GARBAGE FIRE OF THE MIND

    It's the height of summer! Time for fun! Time for swimming and cookouts! Time to get out there and have a good time!

    So Dan and Maureen hear. But they do this podcast, which means they track the news. And this week, Maureen has decided to rebel. No more news. She is done. She has decided to go to the moon.

    But Dan has rented a booth in a co-working space in Santa Fe and demands that the journey continue. What are we learning, SaysWhovia? How does one process 2019, in particular this last week of 2019, which has devolved into a slurry of sewage and anger. The same way as always! Talk through it until either Dan or Maureen has heatstroke or loses a tooth. Maureen dreams of such sweet release. But no, there are tweets to discuss, and 2020 candidates, and Brexit.

    And the moon. There is always the moon.

    And each other.

    Come to the green at midnight, SaysWhovia. We will look at the stars together and eat ice cream.

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    DAN IN A HOT TIN CAR

    Hey, SaysWhovia! It's summertime! It's time for picnics, swimming, lounging, and...checks notes sitting in a hot car at noon in New Mexico recording a podcast!

    Yes, Dan, a Podcasting Professional, has once again found internet on the road. Sure, it's in a hot car, but when have hot cars ever been a problem? There's lots to talk about as Says Who took the holiday week off. Maureen also rode in a car! And swam in a pond! She does not want to talk about politics. But this is Says Who, and we do it so you don't have to. That is our pledge.

    This week, the President's Very Big Parade was rained on. The British revealed their real feelings about Trump. A terrible predator with close ties to the administration was arrested. Someone left the 2020 race, but someone else stepped in, and...

    Dan is out of water. The sun is getting higher.

    Oh, and the President is obsessed with Purell. All germs, really. He really, really does not like germs, almost as much as he really, really likes parades.

    Dan is fading. Someone help Dan.

    And next week is The Big Mueller Show! Time to get the lawn chairs! And the jaws of life! Smash the window, SaysWhovia. It's time to get out!

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    A BAKED POTATO

    Last week, Dan and Maureen were in dire straits. Dan was in the back of a hot car near a pyramid, and Maureen got punched by a dog. This week, things are much better. Dan is now in a hot trailer, and Maureen dog is sleeping, so nothing can go wrong.

    In fact, things are looking up and getting spicy. A hero emerges in Chicago and spits on Eric Trump. NRATV goes down. Mueller's public testimony is scheduled. And the two Democratic debates are about to begin.

    In preparation, Dan has a list of every contenders' favorite comfort foods. Maureen is not emotionally ready. She never will be. Maureen does not want to watch the debates. But she will, because in SaysWhovia, we show up, so you don't have to.

    Get your comfort food. It's time to watch some TV.

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    MEET US BY THE PYRAMID

    We've had lots of times together, SayWhovia. We've experienced many moments together. Today, we are going to experience more, for today is one of the stranger recordings we've ever done in the town square.

    Dan is sweating in the back of a car near a pyramid. Maureen is doing just fine in New York. She is talking about things like the departure of Sarah Sanders, the race for a new Prime Minister in the UK, and the 2020 Democratic debates. Dan is sweating a lot, like, a lot, because he is recording in a back seat in Tennessee.

    But when Dan and Maureen get into the Trump interview, problems develop. Before it's all over, things... go wrong. Not everyone will make it out of this recording in one piece.

    Nothing can stop us, SaysWhovia-- not technical issues, or heat, or the cops, or a giant pyramid, or physical injury... well, that last one might.

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    Rolling Out

    Summer's here, and everyone's hitting the road! Dan's back in his trailer, Maureen's done with her book, and Trump is off making a great impression across the Atlantic. Surely nothing can possibly go wrong.

    Wait for it: Everything kinda went wrong.

    Trump insulted royalty, he threatened to take away the national health service, his large adult sons skipped out on their bar tab, and someone gave him an enormous hat to wear. Plus, he sat down for a meal that contained zero things he might actually eat.

    Put on extra sunscreen, order an extra large Slurpee, and get ready for summer with Says Who because things are heating up!

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    LIVE FROM POD X

    Live from Pod X in beautiful Nashville Tennessee, it's Maureen and Dan out of their closet and basement and instead sitting right next to each other doing an episode! In front of people! Really!

    But whatever could they talk about? Thankfully ROBERT MUELLER HIMSELF spoke! Also in front of people! Really! Did he have the voice of an angel? What did he say? Let's discuss, shall we?

    And then Donald Trump got on an airplane and traveled to Japan to give a sumo wrestler the President's Cup, which was a thing that did not exist until now. And then... they ate food. Steak? Check. Vanilla Ice Cream. Check.

    And finally, we've got 23 candidates for the 2020 Democratic primary which means... Amy Carter's Shoe paid a visit. And she's real.

    If you weren't there in Nashville, come on and dance with the one who brung ya.

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    NOSFERATU 2020

    When we last left them, Dan was in Chicago in the cold drizzle and Maureen was in the puppy pen. Dan is still in the drizzle. Maureen, however, has made it on to the sofa! The puppy is asleep. All is peaceful and calm. Things are good.

    But ARE they, SaysWhovia? Is this situation under any kind of control? What happens when the people who are in charge just stop abiding the law? At what point do we stop tolerating this and fight back? When is enough enough? Where is the line in the sand? WHITHER IMPEACHMENT?

    Dan would like to know. Maureen has thoughts, but the puppy is awake and needs to pee. Ah, no. The puppy is peeing. And it's Sayswhosterpiece Theater time! This time, we have Mr. Says Who himself, Michael Cohen!

    Oh, the puppy is extra awake. The puppy is ready to play. Maureen is losing control of the situation. How does this end? Does SaysWhovia have a dog park?

    Sometimes the tooth is sharp, SaysWhovia, but we keep going.

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